Helpmate provides services to victims of domestic violence in Buncombe County.
Free and confidential.
- 24-Hour Hotline: (828) 254-0516
- Emergency shelter
- Individual and group counseling
- Help building a safe, stable future
- Court advocacy
- Training of professionals and community leaders
- Preventive education for at-risk groups including youth groups
All services are provided to men and women. Helpmate, Inc. does not discriminate based on race, color, religion, sex, national origin, disability, age, sexual orientation or gender identity.
Domestic Violence is also called Intimate Partner Violence.Helpmate works with our community to eliminate abuse and fear by providing safety, shelter, and support for people who have been victimized by domestic violence.
Signs of Domestic Violence
Are you and your children safe? If you answered “yes” to several of these questions below your relationship may not be safe. If you need help deciding, call us now on our confidential hotline: (828) 254-0516
The Person I’m With
- Is not very supportive of things that I do and discourages me from trying new things.
- Does not like to listen when I have something on my mind.
- Does not talk to me when they’re unhappy with something in the relationship.
- Is not willing to compromise.
- Does not understand that we have separate interests and can spend time apart.
- Is mean or rude to my friends.
- Criticizes or distracts me when I’m doing things that don’t involve them.
- Gets extremely jealous or possessive.
- Accuses me of flirting or cheating when I’m not.
- Constantly checks up on me or makes me check in.
- Breaks or throws things when we fight.
- Threatens to destroy my things.
- Tries to control what I do, who I see, what I wear, how I look or who I talk to.
- Makes me feel nervous or like I’m “walking on eggshells.”
- Blames me for problems, puts me down, calls me names or criticizes me.
- Makes me feel like no one else would want me.
- Threatens to hurt themselves, me, my friends, pets or family.
- Grabs, pushes, shoves, chokes, punches, slaps, holds me down, throws things or hurts me in some way.
- Yells, screams or humiliates me in front of other people.
- Pressures, guilts or forces me into having sex or going farther than I want to.
We believe that we are all to be valued, and have the right to speak our truths, be heard, be honored, and achieve our full potential. We all have the right to live in safety, without violence or fear.
We embrace the diversity among ourselves and in our community, and believe that valuing people means respecting and understanding their experiences and beliefs. We are committed to maintaining a diverse organization that reflects our community.
Want to Help?
Helpmate relies on the generosity of individuals, businesses, and organizations in our community. As an independent non-profit agency, Helpmate receives funds from the United Way of Asheville and Buncombe County, federal, state, and local governmental agencies, grants from private foundations, plus donations from people like you. Thank you for your generosity!
You may donate to our organization either by clicking the “Donate” button below, or by mailing a check to:
PO Box 2263
Asheville, NC 28802
The need for our services is growing!
As part of the new Familiy Justice Center, we are able to reach more families in need—now in four locations! With increasing requests for service, we need the support of our community more than ever. Donations of all sizes are appreciated. Together, we can be a community committed to the elimination of violence and fear, and send the message that abuse is not acceptable.
If you would prefer to send a check, please mail it to: Helpmate PO Box 2263 Asheville, NC 28802
Other Ways to Help Abuse Victims
- Endowment and Planned Gifts
- Real Estate Gifts
These types of gifts are much appreciated! Please contact Helpmate’s Development Associate, Pam King, at 828-254-2968 x140 or email@example.com to consider the options and tax benefits.
Over 30% of Americans are acquainted with a woman who has suffered violence from her male partner.
Source: National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey. 2010 Summary Report. CDC
Thank you so much for wanting to donate! We know you have many options for your charitable giving and we are honored that you've thought of Helpmate. We work hard to make sure the families living in our emergency shelter have their basic needs covered. Your donations help us do that and we appreciate your generosity.
Here are the ways you can be most helpful to the survivors in our shelter:
- Small denomination gift cards ($10-$25 to places like Walmart, Ingles, etc). These are extremely helpful and our top priority.
- Like us on facebook here to see specific and urgent needs that arise.
- Choose items to donate from the list below. These items are needed on a regular basis. Due to very limited storage space, we cannot accept any items not on this list.
- When you're ready to donate, contact Pam King at firstname.lastname@example.org to set up an appointment.
- Donations are accepted by appointment only. We cannot have surprise guests at the shelter for security reasons. Please work with Pam to set up a time for you to deliver your donation M-F 9am-4pm.
Thank you so much for donating to Helpmate to support survivors of domestic violence. Your contributions go a long way to provide safety, shelter and support to survivors.
HOLIDAY GIVING: The holidays are a time when the generosity of our community really shines! At this point, all of the families staying at our shelter have been 'adopted' for holiday presents. Everyone will be enjoying lovely meals on Thanksgiving and Christmas thanks to generous donations. How can you help around the holidays? Gift cards or monetary donation! Your gift of small denomination gift cards or monetary donation will allow us to fill any last minute holiday needs. Gift cards also give mothers the opportunity to pick out a holiday gift for their child, knowing what their kids want and need, and experiencing the special joy of giving to a loved one. A heartfelt thank you to all of the generous folks who give during this special time of year.
Ongoing Family and Shelter Needs:
- Shelf Stable Foods
- Frozen Meals
- Granola Bars
- Kitchen Staples (coffee, coffee creamer, cooking oil, sugar, aluminum foil, plastic wrap, salt & pepper, etc.)
- Forks, Spoons, and Knives
- Stainless Steel Pots, Pans and Skillets
- Dishwasher Detergent
- Paper Towels
- Draino/Liquid Plumber
- Laundry Detergent – HE (High Efficiency)
- Garbage Bags (13 Gallon & 30 Gallon)
- Brooms and Mops
- Liquid Hand Soap (in pumps and large jugs for refilling)
- Extra-Long Twin Mattress Covers (ideally bed bug resistant and rip proof)
- Pillows (new or gently used)
- Table Lamps (appropriate for bedside table)
- Diapers Size 2-6
- Baby Wipes
- Baby Monitors
- Gift Cards for Clients (Walmart, K-Mart, Target, Ingles, etc)
- Bath Towels and Wash Cloths (new or gently used)
- Full-Size Shampoo and Body Wash (we do not accept hotel-sized toiletries)
- New Hairbrushes and Hair Ties
- Hair Oil
- Shea Butter
- Alarm Clocks
- Combination Locks
- Date/Appointment Books
- Pocket Calendars
- Spiral Notebooks
- Pocket Size Kleenex
- Pocket Size Hand Sanitizers
- Women’s NEW Underwear, Socks, and Bras (all sizes)
- Children’s NEW Underwear and Socks (all sizes)
We recognize that violence is created in and sustained by our society, and that the elimination of violence begins with societal and global change. We believe that it is the obligation of our local and global community to eradicate violence by challenging a culture that values power and control.
Having a gun in the home increases the risk of homicide 20 times when there is a history of domestic violence.Source John Hopkins Center for Gun Policy and Research, 2010
About 1 in 4 women (24.3%) have experienced severe physical violence by their partner (for example, been hit with a fist or other object, been shaken, or shoved into something) at some point in their lives.The National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey: 2010
There are many ways you can volunteer for Helpmate:
- Accounting Support Volunteers
- Building and Grounds Maintenance
- Case Management Advocates
- Children's Services
- Community and Prevention Educators
- Family Justice Center Receptionists
- Hotline Advocates
- Reception/Shelter Resource Volunteers
- Special Events Volunteers
- Survivor Voices Speaker's Bureau
- Voices in Action (Survivor Engagement/Activism Program)
If you are interested in volunteering or participating in a formal internship to meet college program requirements, please contact Christy Price, Helpmate's Director of Outreach & Volunteer Programming at (828)254-2968 ext. 112 or email@example.com.
Download the Volunteer Application Packet here: Helpmate Volunteer Application Packet (Please note: downloading this packet from our site may not be safe if you are in a dangerous situation. If you have any doubts about your safety, please instead call us at (828) 254-0516.)
Helpmate Offers Free Prevention Education and Professional Training!
Helpmate offers a variety of educational and training opportunities at no cost to first responding professionals (e.g.social workers, healthcare providers, law enforcement and school personnel), local businesses, civic groups, faith communities, etc. We also offer prevention education to youth ages 12-21 at local middle and high schools, youth groups, summer camps, etc. We offer education for substance abuse recovery program participants, pregnancy support groups, and any other group that might be considered higher-risk of experiencing intimate partner violence.
Education and Training Contact
For more information about our educational and training programs or to schedule a Helpmate presenter, please contact Christy Price, Helpmate's Director of Outreach & Volunteer Programming at (828) 254-2968, ext. 112 or firstname.lastname@example.org.
Youth Prevention Education
Prevention Educators offer these workshops about healthy relationships and dating abuse prevention to youth ages 12-18 in public and private schools, youth groups, and summer camps.
- Dating Violence 101: A one-session curriculum teaching teens to identify abusive behaviors and cultivate healthy relationships.
- Safe Dates: An evidence-based multi-session curriculum teaching teens to:
- identify red flags
- gain skills to help friends in abusive relationships
- cultivate healthy relationships through anger management, conflict resolution, and positive communication.
- Training of Trainers: These workshops are focused on teaching educators and other youth workers about how to talk about dating abuse with teens.
- Talking with Your Teens: A workshop focused on teaching parents how to identify signs of abusive relationships and support their teens in cultivating healthy relationships.
- Teen Tech Safety: Providing youth with tools to prevent technological abuse.
Professionals and Community Member Education
Helpmate offers workshops that cover one or more of the following topics. Workshops vary in length and number of sessions. We are happy to tailor education workshops to fit the needs of your group.
- Domestic Violence (DV) 101: This training focuses on defining and understanding the complexities of domestic violence and how to respond appropriately.
- DV and Substance Abuse: This training is about recognizing and addressing the link between domestic violence and substance abuse as a coping mechanism.
- DV and the Impact on Families: An 8-hour quarterly training for allied professionals who may interact with survivors of domestic violence. This training covers in-depth information about the dynamics of intimate partner violence, including its impact on children.
- DV in the Workplace: This workshop explores how businesses can create awareness and policies that appropriately address DV in the workplace.
- Lethality Assessment: This training teaches what the lethality indicators are for a victim of Domestic Violence and how to appropriately respond after recognizing the risk factors.
- DV and Animal Abuse: This is a class for veterinarians, vet techs, and animal control officers, drawing the connection between domestic violence and pet abuse. This class covers learning how to identify and support victims of domestic violence.
- Training for Allied Professionals: This training provides the skills needed to identify, respond to, and make referrals for survivors of domestic violence.
- Faith Communities: Various trainings specifically geared towards faith leaders, congregation members, and youth. These trainings focus on teaching skills to identify and prevent abuse and creating a community of support in a congregation. Presentations during weekly services are also available.
- DV Ed - This is an 8-week series offered for survivors of Domestic Violence.
Helpmate provided training to Aabani Salon professionals on 1/30/17. Click on the image to check out the WLOS news story about this partnership!
Helpmate is partnering with local salons and barber shops to offer free training on intimate partner violence. For more information, please contact our Volunteer & Outreach Coordinator at (828) 254-2968, ext. 112 or email@example.com.
- Nearly half of all women and men in the United States have experienced psychological aggression by an intimate partner in their lifetime. (1) 48%
- Intimate partner violence accounts for 15% of all violent crime (3) 15%
- More than 60% of domestic violence incidents happen at home 60%
- 1 in 7 men have experienced severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime (3) 14%
- Recent global prevalence figures indicate that about 1 in 3 (35%) of women worldwide have experienced either physical and/or sexual intimate partner violence or non-partner sexual violence in their lifetime. (6) 35%
- Only 34% of people who are injured by intimate partners receive medical care for their injuries 34%
- In the United States, domestic violence crimes account for up to 40 percent of all calls to police. (5) 40%
- Only about 55% of domestic violence incidents are reported to the police. (3) 55%
- 11% of calls to police to report domestic violence are placed by a child in the family. (7) 11%
- 1 in 15 children are exposed to intimate partner violence each year, and 90% of these children are eyewitnesses to this violence. (7) 6%
- The presence of a gun in a domestic violence situation increases the risk of homicide by 500% (2) 500%
- In 2 out of 3 female homicide cases, females are killed by a family member or intimate partner 75%
- 72% of all murder-suicides involve an intimate partner; 94% of the victims of these murder/suicides are women 72%
- Nearly 1 in 10 women in the United States (9.4%) has been raped by an intimate partner in her lifetime. (1) 9.4%
1National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey 2010 2Risk factors for femicide in abusive relationships: Results from a multisite case control study. American Journal of Public Health, 93(7), 1089-1097. viiiTruman, J. L. & Morgan, R. E. (2014). 3Ruman, J. L. & Morgan, R. E. (2014). Nonfatal domestic violence, 2003-2012. Retrieved from http://www.bjs.gov/content/pub/pdf/ndv0312.pdf. 4Jackson, N.A. 1996, “Observational experiences of intrapersonal conflict and teenage victimization: A comparative study among spouses and cohabiters” – Journal of Family Violence, vol. 11, pp. 191-203. 5“Equality Denied. The Status of Women in Policing.” National Center for Women and Policing, 1999. 6 World Health Organization 2016 7 “Children’s Exposure to Intimate Partner Violence and Other Family Violence” U.S. Department of Justice, National Survey of Children’s Exposure to Violence, October 2011.
Program Director, Joanna Knowles
Director of Outreach and Volunteer Programming, Christy Price
Administrative Associate, Victoria Dedmon
Associate Shelter Coordinator, Jill Kapiloff
Bilingual Case Manager, Sam Pinto
Case Management Coordinator, Jodi Wygmans
Child and Family Advocate, Grace Anixter
Community Case Manager, Addie Burton-Walsh
Community Case Manager, Dori English
Community Case Manager, Lauren Jackson
Counseling Coordinator, Lauren Ray
Court Advocate, Maggie Slocumb
Court Advocate Coordinator, Amy Rohan
Development Associate, Pam King
Financial Coordinator, Catherine Shore
Intake Specialist, Carolina Robles
Intake Specialist, Marissa Uhl
IPV Healthcare Project Manager, Brenda Amezquita-Castro
Latina Support Group Facilitator, Ileana Calderon
Marketing Associate, Jay Springer
Operations Manager, Tracy Ashby-Wagner
Overnight Shelter Case Manager, Amarilis Harper
Prevention Educator, Hannah Stampe
Prevention Educator, Kit Gruelle
Overnight Shelter Case Manager, Angie Hill
Shelter Case Manager, Erica Deaton
Shelter Case Manager, Erica Johnson
Shelter Coordinator, Joy Henderson
Systems Advocate, Erin Bee
Vice President of IT, DoctorDirectory.com
Bonnie Spradling, Vice President
Nonprofit Executive, retired
Gary Snipes, Jr., Treasurer
Director, Global Accounts Management, Flextronics
Susan Odom, Vice Treasurer
Director, Emergency Department, Haywood Regional Medical Center
Dr. John Stewart, Secretary
Financial Planner, Starks Financial
Bellows Management Consulting, Inc.
Associate Director for Athletic Operations, UNC-Asheville
Certified Financial Planner, Merrill Lynch
Owner, Geaux Girl Concierge
Vice-President, Hour Glass Cleaners, Inc.
Social Worker, Buncombe County Dept. of Social Services
Executive Director, Women and Children’s Services
Hayley Roper Wells
Attorney, Ward & Smith, P.A.
We believe that hope, change, and healing are possible, and that people can transcend painful experiences, grow, and thrive.
A special thank you to CarePartners Foundation for their tremendous support of our Men Who Care Luncheon in 2017!
We believe that to serve our clients, we must model a violence-free community that is founded in respect and equality. By providing safety, shelter, counseling, and advocacy, we empower each client to create a life that is free of violence; by providing education, we empower our community to create a world that is free of violence.